I don't Do Colors

Anyone who knows me knows black is my color of predilection. Really.
Oh, I love black.
See, I love how black alters the dangerous curves of my body.
I love how black fits with everything.
Maybe I love black it is because everyday is a funeral.
Funerals to anything good that could happen to me.


See, too many times, I have said I will wear a certain type of clothes when I will have lost all the weight.
I recognize that the main statement about my clothing is "Whatever".
Yes. Whatever. I just throw on whatever fits me.
But a Whatever clothing statement leads to a Whatever attitude.
Not from me. But from many people engaging in a relationship/friendship with me.

Lately, I just let go of everything weight-related.
I don't botter anymore.
I just.. let it go.
And, as a result, I started to lose weight.
Not a lot, sure. But Still losing.

The crazy thing is... I took the decision to get rid of black.
I realized that, it is not because I am fat, that I can't dress nice.
Or sexy.
Or flambloyant.
Or with colors.
So, I promised myself this: next time I need to buy a piece of clothing, it needs to have colors.
VIBRANT COLORS.

Today, I told my friend that I want to buy leggings for my birthday party.
Her answer: FINALLY!
Yes, I do wear baggy clothes.
I have great difficulties to show my legs.
My big thighs.
My calfs
I feel naked whenever I wear tight pants.

But I took the decisions to try on leggings for my birthday.
I hope I won't feel like crying, or hiding, or whatever. I'm actually scared.

Everybody knows I am a MotherF*cking Monster

Stumbled upon this video this morning. I think I watched it like 5 times, with goosebumps. It is from the Brave New Voices Grand Slam Finals 2013 round 4 in Washington, D.C.

These girls are good and what they say is so true!!
LOVE IT!

Quote On Success

''If you have no critics, you'll likely have no success.''
                        -Malcolm X

"The years teach much which the days never know."
                       -Ralph Waldo Emerson

Love after love

Love After Love

The time will come
when, with elation
you will greet yourself arriving
at your own door, in your own mirror
and each will smile at the other's welcome,

and say, sit here. Eat.
You will love again the stranger who was your self.
Give wine. Give bread. Give back your heart
to itself, to the stranger who has loved you

all your life, whom you ignored
for another, who knows you by heart.
Take down the love letters from the bookshelf,

the photographs, the desperate notes,
peel your own image from the mirror.
Sit. Feast on your life.

Derek Walcott

''You have to love yourself as much as you love everybody else and every little things.'' -Oprah